英語(yǔ)幽默小笑話匯集
新西蘭的氣候
The Climate of New Zealand
Teacher: Matthew, what is the climate of New Zealand?
Matthew: Very Cold, sir.
Teacher: Wrong.
Matthew: But, sir! When they send us meat it always arrives frozen!
老師：馬修，新西蘭的氣候怎么樣?
馬修：先生，那里的天氣很冷。
老師：錯(cuò)了。
馬修：可是，先生!從那兒運(yùn)來(lái)的豬肉都凍得硬邦邦的。
Good news or Bad news?
An artist was part of an exhibition, and he asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings that were currently on display.
"I've got good news and bad news," the owner replied.
"Give me the good news first," the artist demanded.
"The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings."
"That's wonderful!" the artist exclaimed, "What could the bad news possibly be?"
With concern, the gallery owner replied, "The gentleman in question was your doctor."
以為藝術(shù)家在一個(gè)畫廊辦了個(gè)展覽，他問店主是否有人對(duì)他參展的畫感興趣。
“我有一個(gè)好消息和一個(gè)壞消息。”店主回答。
“先告訴我好消息。”畫家要求道。
“好消息是一位紳士詢問了你的作品，還問它是否會(huì)在你死后增。我告訴他會(huì)的，然后他買下了你所有的15幅畫作。”
“那太棒了!”畫家驚嘆。“那么什么會(huì)是壞消息呢?”
店主想了想之后說(shuō)：“問那個(gè)問題的是你的`醫(yī)生”。
I don't think I know
Teacher: "John, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"
John: "What do you think it is, sir?"
Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!"
John: "I don't think I know either, sir!"
老師：“John，動(dòng)詞ring的過去分詞是什么?”。
約翰：“你想它是什么呢”?
老師：“我不用想，我知道!”。
約翰：“我想我不知道”。
A Girl's Name 女孩的名字
When our daughter was born, we named her Myles, after my beloved late(已故的) father, despite family warning that the name was too masculine(男性的) .
Years later, when I felt she was old enough to understand, I explained to Myles, Your name is very special. I named you after my own father because I loved him very much. I know he would be proud of you.
Myles thought carefully about this and then said, I know all that, Mom. But I don't understand why my grandfather had a girl's name.
女兒出生時(shí)，我們給她取名叫邁爾斯，和我深愛的業(yè)已過世的父親同一個(gè)名字，不過家人提醒這個(gè)名字太男性化了。
幾年以后，我覺得邁爾斯已經(jīng)長(zhǎng)大，能夠懂事了。我對(duì)她解釋說(shuō)：你的名字很特別。我給你取了一個(gè)和我爸爸一樣的名字，因?yàn)槲曳浅鬯Ｎ蚁嘈潘麜?huì)為你而深感自豪的。
邁爾斯很仔細(xì)地想了一下，然后說(shuō)道：這些我都懂，媽媽�？墒俏也恢劳夤珵槭裁磿�(huì)有一個(gè)女孩子的名字。
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