精選幽默英語(yǔ)笑話合集
笑話是幽默的載體，一個(gè)成功的笑話能流傳千古，聽(tīng)者和講者都會(huì)感到快樂(lè)、欣喜，拍掌叫好!生活需要笑話，今天我們就一起來(lái)看看精選幽默英語(yǔ)笑話合集吧!
精選幽默英語(yǔ)笑話合集(一)
The thrill is gone 真掃興
About two weeks before our fifth anniversary, my husband ased me what I would like for a gift. I told him I wanted something impractical and romantic.
On our anniversary, he presented me with a lovely gold bracelet. "A little four-letter word made me get this for you," he said softly.
"Oh, how sweet," I whispered. "L-O-V-E?"
"No," he replied. "S-A-L-E."
我們結(jié)婚五周年前大約兩周時(shí)，我丈夫問(wèn)我喜歡什么禮物。我告訴他我要那些沒(méi)有實(shí)用價(jià)值卻又富于浪漫色彩的。
在我們的周年紀(jì)念日那天，他向我展示了一副可愛(ài)的'金手鐲。“一個(gè)小小的四字詞，讓我為你買(mǎi)了這個(gè)。”他溫和地說(shuō)。
“哦，多甜蜜。”我耳語(yǔ)他。“L-O-V-E(愛(ài))?”
“不對(duì)，”他回答。“S-A-L-E.(處理品)”
精選幽默英語(yǔ)笑話合集(二)
The Buffalo Theory
In one epsiode of "Cheers", Cliff is seated at the bar describing the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here it is, for your enjoyment:
"Well, you see Norm, it's like this...
A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the heard is hunted, it is the lowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake6 of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
精選幽默英語(yǔ)笑話合集(三)
In The Bag
A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde robbed a supermarket.
As they were stealing, a police officer walked in the store and saw what was happening.
He dashed toward them, but they were able to get away into the back of the store.
There, they found three sacks to hide in.
When the police officer checked there, he examined each sack.
He kicks the first bag, and the redhead says "meow" in a high voice.
The cop determines that it must only be a cat in that bag, and he moves on to the next.
When he kicks the second bag, the brunette says "woof" in a low voice.
The officer determines that it must only be a dog in that bag, so he moves on to the last bag.
He kicks the third bag, and the blonde shouts "potato" to the officer.
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