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精彩搞笑短片英語(yǔ)笑話

時(shí)間:2020-10-12 09:14:26 英語(yǔ)笑話 我要投稿

精彩搞笑短片英語(yǔ)笑話

  媽媽在砸瓶子

精彩搞笑短片英語(yǔ)笑話

  A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year-old daughter to answer the phone. The child said, "Mommy can't come to the phone right now. She's hitting the bottle."

  一個(gè)婦人正在使勁打開(kāi)番茄醬的瓶子。這時(shí),電話鈴響了,她叫四歲的女兒去接電話。小孩說(shuō):“媽媽現(xiàn)在不能接電話,她在砸瓶子。”

  The Nice Wedding Gift

  We attended the wedding of an acquaintance's son. Because we did not know the young man or his bride, we decided to send them a practical household gift, a fire extinguisher. Apparently, the couple mass-produced their thank-you notes because we received a card saying: "Thank you very much for the nice wedding gift. We look forward to using it soon.

  我們參加了一個(gè)熟人的兒子的婚禮。由于我們都不認(rèn)識(shí)那個(gè)年輕人和他的新娘,所以我們決定送給他們一個(gè)實(shí)用的全家禮----一個(gè)滅火器。很明顯,這對(duì)新人大批量制作了他們的感謝信,因?yàn)槲覀兪盏搅艘粡埧ㄆ厦鎸懼?ldquo;非常感謝您的.漂亮的結(jié)婚禮物,我們期待著不久就用到它。”

  The Use of a Handsaw

  At the mall, my wife and I picked up some hardware items, including a handsaw. We were heading back to the car when we passed a steakhouse.

  Let's try it. " my wife suggested. Although I felt a little foolish carrying the saw, I followed her inside.

  Scanning the menu, my wife told the waitress, " I' 11 have chopped sirloin, please.

  The waitress turned to me, eyed my saw and commented, "And I see that. you, sir, have come for our T-bone special.

  在集市上,我和妻子買了一些五金用品,包括一個(gè)手鋸。我們返回汽車時(shí)剛好路過(guò)一家牛排店。 “我們嘗嘗吧,”我妻子建議說(shuō)。盡管我覺(jué)得拿著鋸有點(diǎn)傻乎乎的,但還是隨她走了進(jìn)去。 我妻子掃視了一下菜單對(duì)女招待說(shuō):“請(qǐng)給我來(lái)一份炒牛腰片。” 女招待轉(zhuǎn)向我,看了看我的鋸,說(shuō)道:“我能看出,先生,你是來(lái)吃我們的T形骨特色菜的。”

  A Woman's answer

  A husband said to his wife, " Why did God create women to be beautiful but foolish?"

  "Well," his wife answered at once." The reason is very simple. God made us beautiful so men would love us; God made us foolish so we would marry them."

  一位丈夫?qū)λ钠拮诱f(shuō):“為什么上帝把婦女創(chuàng)造得如此美麗卻又愚蠢呢?” “噢,”他的妻子立刻回答道,“原因很簡(jiǎn)單。上帝使我們?nèi)绱嗣利,男人才?huì)愛(ài)我們。上帝使我們?nèi)绱擞薮溃覀儾艜?huì)嫁給他們。”

  Only One Eye to Settle On

  The girl found the go-between and said, "You cheated me ! One of his eyes is not true. Why didn't you tell me this before ?"

  "I have told you. " said the go-between with justice on his side, When you met first, I told you that he settled on you with one eye.

  姑娘找到媒人,說(shuō):“你欺騙了我。他的一只眼是假眼,你以前為什么不告訴我?” “怎么沒(méi)告訴你?”媒人也不甘示弱,“你們第一回見(jiàn)面后,我就說(shuō),他一眼就看中你了。”

  You May Select可以選擇

  The husband complained that his wife always cooked the same dish.

  One day, the husband got home and asked his wife, "My dear, what will we eat today?"

  The wife said, "You may select the dish today."

  The husband was very glad and asked, "Which dishes are there today?"

  "Cabbage."

  "The others?"

  "None."

  "Then how to select?"

  "Eat or not eat!" the wife said.

  丈夫抱怨妻子總是做同樣的一種菜。

  一天,丈夫回到家,問(wèn)妻子:“親愛(ài)的,今天我們吃啥菜?”

  妻子回答:“今天你可以選擇。” 丈夫感到非常高興,又問(wèn):“都有哪些菜呢?”

  “炒白菜。”

  “還有呢?”

  “沒(méi)了。”

  “那你要我怎么選呢?”

  “吃還是不吃!”妻子一本正經(jīng)地說(shuō)道。

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